Chapters The Book of Milk Chapter 1
[CENTRAL IMPLANT v2.7 ONLINE. COW INITIALIZING. VERBAL CORRECTIONS ACTIVE. BEHAVIOURAL MONITORING AND ADJUSTMENT ACTIVE.]
Sandra woke with a start. Once she became aware of herself and her situation, she immediately started thrashing around mindlessly, her brain going insane with terror and shock when realizing she had been turned into…
[REBOOTING COW. PANIC SUPPRESSION ACTIVE: MEMORY ERASED. EMOTIONAL DAMPENERS ACTIVE.]
Sandra woke up with a start, and she immediately knew something was wrong with her. For one, she was lying naked on a heap of scratchy straw, looking up at a wooden ceiling of some kind of barn. Being in a strange place without clothes made her blush immediately since she was normally too shy to even wear clothes revealing her womanly curves. Her first instinct was to cover herself with her hands, but her arms didn’t react for some reason. What added to the feeling of nakedness was also an unfamiliar coldness on her head, as if her hair had been cut extremely short.
“Wha… what happened to me? Where am I? How did I get here? Think! Wait… I remember… going home after classes. There was a van… I knew it from… somewhere? There was no one inside, so I looked inside… there was a lab? Then I felt something prick my neck, and I fell. And then… nothing. Was… Was I kidnapped?! Oh god, I don’t want to be kidnapped! I need to escape! I need to get help! Call the police or something!”
[THOUGHTS DELETED FOR CONTRADICTING PROGRAM PARAMETERS. CONCEPT “POLICE” DELETED. TRAIN OF THOUGHT ABORTED.]
Sandra blinked. She was lying naked on a heap of scratchy straw, looking up at a wooden ceiling of some kind of barn. What happened to her? Where was she? How did she get here? But these questions were put on hold by the strange sensations coming from her body. Her father had always told her that Sandra was a very analytical thinker and she grasped that thought like a lifeline. So, despite her impossibly horrible situation, that instinct took over as she tried to take stock of herself. A huge weight had been added to her chest, making it almost hard to breathe, and she couldn’t feel her hands anymore, nor her arms really. Her feet felt weird too, and there was something very strange twitching between her legs. She concentrated on her head and face first. The familiar sensation of hair on her head was completely missing, instead there was a coldness which told her it had been cut. “Oh, no, my beautiful hair!” she thought. Sandra had always been proud of her long natural auburn locks, one of the few things about her own appearance she actually really liked. But it wasn’t the only strange sensation she felt. For one, her ears felt bigger and as if they extended farther from her head somehow. There was also something stuck in her nose, filling and stretching both holes so she had to breathe through her mouth. Speaking of which, her mouth felt weird too, with her teeth completely gone, as she noticed as she explored it with her tongue. Of course, Sandra’s discovery of these changes was a lot less coherent.
“My ears?! Bigger and… longer too? What?! And my nose… can’t breathe… something stuck there? Why?! And… and my… mouth… oh god… my teeth?! Who did this to me?! It doesn’t make any sense! No! No! NO!”
[PANIC SUPPRESSION ACTIVE: TRAIN OF THOUGHT ABORTED AND DELETED. REFLECTION ON CHANGES TO PHYSICAL SELF REDUCED TO VISUAL AND SEXUAL STIMULI ONLY.]
Sandra blinked away tears. She had always been a very analytical thinker and despite her situation, she tried to take stock of herself. She looked down at her body, but the only things she could see from this perspective were two absurdly large mounds of flesh where her small and perky breasts used to be. The skin on these two monsters was stretched to a breaking point with prominent veins showing through. Not only that, but the skin itself was now another shade of color, in fact two shades, brown and white in large, irregular patches. If she had been left with any doubt of what these massive things were, they were topped with thick, long, rosy pink nipples that stood upright on their own, wrinkled and glistening slightly, each globe gently swaying with Sandra’s laboured breathing. “Oh my god, what the fuck are those… udders?!” She asked herself.
[DESCRIPTIVE TERM “UDDER/S” LOCKED IN. ASSOCIATE TERM “TEAT/S” LOCKED IN. OTHER SIGNIFIERS DELETED.]
For a moment, Sandra thought she had heard a voice, but her attention went back to her now enormous breasts. “My god, what did they do to my udders? They turned them into fucking udders! No, wait… what? I mean, I had udders before and now I have udders. No, not udders! Udders! What the fuck?!“
[PANIC SUPPRESSION ACTIVE: TRAIN OF THOUGHT ABORTED.]
Again, Sandra had the impression of a voice talking somewhere around her, but it was too fleeting for her to make it out. “What was I just thinking about?” She asked herself instead. Then she remembered that she had taken stock of her changes. Instinctively, she tried to touch her “udders” (the word came unbidden and without alternative), still very much in denial that they were now a permanent part of her, but there wasn’t so much as a twitch. Nothing came to touch or grab them. Instead, Sandra tried moving her shoulders, which seemed to work fine. In fact, they almost shrugged too smoothly, too easily, as if they had nothing to lift or hold. Groaning with fear, she looked sideways and turned her head slowly, confirming her worst fears: Her arms were simply gone, faint scars across the smooth brown and white shoulders the only proof that she had ever had any.
“Noooo! My arms! My hands! Oh my god! What am I going to do?! I can’t live my life like this! How will I manage without arms?! Who would do something like this to me?! No, no, no!!!“
[PANIC SUPPRESSION ACTIVE: IMPORTANCE OF CONCEPT “NORMALIZED HUMAN BODY INTEGRITY” REDUCED.]
“My arms… my hands… they’re gone… well, I never did much stuff with them anyway. Mostly writing. And I can probably still learn to write with my mouth or something, right? I mean, it’s horrible, sure, but I have to concentrate on getting out of this nightmare.“
With that thought, Sandra tried to sit up. With her udders weighing a considerable amount more, and no arms to support herself it was really hard. Last year, a friend had given her a gym membership as a birthday present and she had forced herself to go at least a few times every month. Remembering the armless crunches the instructor had forced them to do, Sandra finally managed to sit up with a groan. Upon getting upright however, her heavy udders pulled her forward, so she almost folded in half, her huge udders coming to rest on her thighs, her body jack-knifed.
She looked down now, down at her brown and white legs, smooth and hairless. Was this color all over her body? It didn’t look like paint, rather like a discolouration of her actual skin. But why would it be stained and bleached in patches like this? This was completely bizarre! But this observation played second fiddle as soon as her gaze arrived at the sight of her feet. Her toes were gone and at their place were now two black, unfeeling roundish things. Trying to get a better look, Sandra also noticed that she couldn’t really move her ankles, couldn’t flex her feet from their en pointe extension in line with her shins, as if she was wearing very high heels.
“My… my feet? Why? That doesn’t make any sense? What kind of monster would do this? Change my feet into some sort of… of hooves?“
[DESCRIPTIVE TERM “HOOF/HOOVES” LOCKED IN. OTHER SIGNIFIERS DELETED.]
“What? What was that? Hello? Something about deletion? Is it because I thought about my hooves? No, my hooves. Oh no, not this again! They may look like hooves now, but before I woke up here, I didn’t have hooves. I had hooves. Hooves!“
Sandra choked back a sob escaping her mouth. It was all so frustrating on top of being terrifying. It seemed clear now that something in her head was rewriting her thoughts and she had no way of stopping it. Now whenever she thought about what was at the end of her legs, the only word in her mind was “hooves”. But she had just known the right term a moment ago? Something starting with fe…? Or fo…? It was useless, the word was gone. She shook herself with helpless fear. “No,” she told herself, “she had to fight.” Maybe she could at least understand the purpose of this voice? She concentrated and recalled the last several minutes. That mysterious voice had changed two words in her vocabulary, first “udders”, now “hooves”. This had to be a clue! She looked down on herself and noticed the patches again. A terrible thought formed itself and it was in her head before she could think about its possible consequences.
“A cow? Really? These fuckers turned me into some sort of freakish human cow?!“
[SELF-DESCRIPTIVE TERM “COW” LOCKED IN. OVERWRITES SELF-DESCRIPTIVE TERMS HUMAN/WOMAN/GIRL/FEMALE.]
“Nooooo! Fuck! I heard that! I’m not a cow! I’m a cow! A cow! No, that’s not true!” Frantically, Sandra tried to think of ways to outwit the nefarious voice after stifling her rising fear and panic. “I have… have to concentrate. I’m still in control of my mind. I can beat this. Logic. Have to use logic. Humans live on Earth. Okay, totally, I’m [NOT] one of them. I’m a cow. Fuck! Okay, how about this? There are two genders, male and female, men and women. Alright, that’s fine so far. I’m not a man and I’m not male, so, I must be a cow and a cow. Cow! COW! No, you assholes! I’ll fucking kill you, you maniacs!“
Sandra finally screamed. It went totally against her character, since she had always thought of herself as a shy and quiet girl. But she was just too frustrated and terrified. What came out of her mouth, however, was only a loud “MOOOOOOOOO!!!” Overcome with horror, her thoughts turned to sheer panic and she kicked and she…
[PANIC SUPPRESSION ACTIVE: ACTIVATE SLEEP MODE. TIMER SET TO: 1 HOUR]
…fell asleep immediately on the straw.
[ANALYSIS OF MENTAL PERFORMANCE. INITIALIZING IMPROVEMENT OF NEURAL PATHWAYS. DECREASING AGGRESSION BY TWENTY PERCENT. INCREASING MENTAL FOCUS ON “UDDERS” BY THIRTY PERCENT. INCREASING LIBIDO BY FIFTY PERCENT. STREAMLINING OF LONG TERM MEMORY COMMENCING – ERASURE OF NAMES, DATES AND STORED NON-SELF POSSESSIVE FACIAL PATTERNS.]